Something Wrong With You
by Implied.Awesome
Summary: "Parker, why are you cutting your hair at 4 in the morning?" "Well when else am I supposed to do it?"   A group of drabbles involving the craziness of Parker, and how Eliot grows to love it.
1. Hair

**A/N- Yeah, I know it's totally uncannon, but I love Eliot/Parker. I mean I guess like whatever. :P **

**Reviews are like a naked Christian Kane. So basically, very good. **

**Enjoy**!

_Thump! Rumble rumble, clatter!_

It was 3:29 A.M and before the anger of being waken up fully sunk in, two thoughts came to Eliot's mind:

1. The Leverage headquarters had only been converted into an apartment for the group once state of the art- and he meant _really_ state of the art- security systems had been set up. Not to mention Eliot's room was closest to the front door, and he could kill a man 13 different ways without having to even pick up a weapon, so who could be stupid enough to try and break in?

2. No one. Duh. So if that was Hardison bumbling around in the kitchen looking of finish off the rest of his pecan pie? There _would_ be hell to pay.

When you only got 90 minutes of sleep a night, every second mattered.

But being pissed and groggy didn't mean he was stupid. And in his opinion, being stupid was letting your guard down. So he rose from his bed silently and

His eyes were useless in the black but ears were open, waiting for the tell-tale sounds of either the hacker cursing out a stubbed toe, or an intruder tearing up the place looking for god only knew.

He heard neither.

Closer he drew to the source of the noise- which it turned out was the little bathroom off the right of the kitchen. The light was on and stopped a few feat short of the door, listening hard. After the sounds of drawers being open and shut silenced he heard….snipping?

His body in full attack mode, he grabbed the knob of the door and yanked it open. And there, hunched over the little sink, scissors in hand…was Parker.

"Parker!" Eliot lowered his fists and tried to keep his voice under control not wanting to wake the others. Not that Parker had even attempted to do the same, all that clattering.

"What the- are you…_cutting your hair?_"

"Yeah, so what? I don't like other people getting that close to my face with scissors." She continued snipping away little strands of blond hair from her bangs. Eliot was dumbfounded.

"Parker, it's nearly four in the morning!"

"Yeah."

"You're cutting your hair. At four in the morning." Only Parker would have the gaul to look peeved at _him. _

"Well when else am I supposed to do it?"

For a moment there was silence. There was no winning with this girl.

"There's something wrong with you."

Parker merely shrugged and went back to her task, and Eliot went to bed, baffled by the mystery that was Parker.


	2. Split

**Prompt: Split**

**Word Count: 331**

**Summary: Parker wants a banana split. If only it were that simple... **

"Hey Eliot?"

The hitter sighed inwardly, knowing nothing good could come out of that tone.

"Yes Parker?"

"Would you buy me a banana split?" I knew it. Middle of a con, and she wants me to buy her freaking' ice cream. There is something seriously wrong with this girl.

"Parker, we're on a job. I am not going to buy you ice cream while we're _on a job_."

"But we finished our parts of the con forever ago! Come on. We're at a carnival, and I want yummies.". Eliot sighed again.

"Parker, you have plenty of money. Why don't you buy it yourself?"

Parker gaped, horrified.

"And spend my precious money? Are you out of your mind!"

He groaned and muttered under his breathe, "No, but you definitely are."

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Look, if I buy you your freakin' ice cream will ya stop bothering me?"

She smiled and nodded, the pigtails she was wearing for the con bouncing absurdly.

"Fine."

Parker beamed as she looped her arm around his in a type of one-armed side hug. He grumbled, but did not pull away.

"If it makes you feel any better, you can have the bananas. I never eat them anyway."

"What? Parker, if you don't like bananas, why buy a banana split?"

"I like the banana-y taste. Just not that actual bananas." She said it just like she always did when explaining one of her (many) oddities; like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"….There's something very wrong with you."

Parker just smiled and tugged him closer, knowing in the end it didn't matter.

She was still getting her ice cream.


End file.
